Mera Jaise Koi Nahin

What do I say about these so called “Torture Serials” (as I like to call them), guyz.. The lesser we talk about them the better!! (Else I’ll have to face my mom’s wrath!!). Neway.. I have mustered enough courage to go ahead and voice my opinion. Damn It! I am an honest, respectable (?), law abiding (?) citizen of Independent (that’s what they say!) India. So here goes..

Why am I grumbling about these serials in the first place? The stupid (If any of you belong to this category, please ignore the adjective!! I don’t want to face another saga in real life!!) people watching those serials are happy, the TV channels are happy and the producers (Read Ekta) are grinning-ear-to-ear.

There are several reasons for my outrage… First and foremost one-line-per-week scripts which stretch the story in such a way, that… if the same thing was done by a lingerie company.. they would have fitted a sumo wrestler into a bikini!!! (just the thought makes me giggle.. chup.. this is a serious blog.. so move out of the parantheses…!).Strange metaphor! But drives home my point. And to top it.. you have the same bahus fighting the same battle with their saas.. (Move over Lucas.. ur Star Wars contained only 6 episodes). To top it you have these fifty-plus-wannabe-models wearing oh-so-loong bindis, sporting the sleaziest of the saris and whitewashing their hair red, blue and what not!! (Yucks!! Feel like omitting at the thought!). The most surprising part is that it has captured the tv-is-a-bad-influence generation. Now they are watching these more than what we used to do. And then there has to be their “EXPERT” comments, which does not end when the episode ends.. they have to talk about what Tulsi or Jassi ( just a couple of names I could understand from their commentary.) should have or should’nt have done. Huh! Givemme a break!! When will they grow up!!! ( Am I actually saying this!).

This is a sincere request for the so called moral-police. Please ban these serials!!! Forget my moral values.. I am going mad here… But I know that my pleas will fall to deaf ears cos the so called moral-police are none other than the saas-bahu-wars-watching generation. I know that I can’t mend them. However, I want to warn our generation…. I must give our generation a name… hmm.. ok the ipod generation… because we are different from the harry-potter generation (say 10-19 year olds) or the pokemon generation ( 6-16 year olds). We have to wage a war against the Dark Side, and we will not stop until we get our hands on the remote control…until we become Lord Of the Remote!! So what if we may have to spend hungry nights (cos u’r mom got pissed of by your revolt).. or get yelled at by your granny (who is the director of most of the serials.. or so she makes us believe!!!) we are not bulging from the sofa…

So Guyz… May the force (your own!!) be with you!! (Even when you are hungry;-))

Sab kushal "Mangal" Hai!!

After 4 years of anticipation, several hours of talk on Aamir’s moustache and hairdos and more than 1 hour in the queue I got a balcony ticket for the “Bap of the Baps” magnum opus of the year 2005 “Mangal Pandey – The Rising”. As the lights went off and the curtains rolled up, my anxiousness was getting the better of me.

10 minutes into the movie brought me, who was soaring high above on a jet plane, SLAM BANG! down to earth. This is India, my friend!! The more hype a movie creates before its launch, the lesser quality product you get!! Now, I am thinking why the movie got released after all. It would have been much exciting to be in anticipation.

Aamir “Mangal” Khan is the one guy whose stands tall amidst the ashes. He gives a stellar performance gallantly fighting to save the sinking ship alone!! (Reminiscent of a similar sequence in the movie). Rani has been wasted in this movie. After her awe inspiring performance in BLACK, the role she portrays is just to keep the front benches whistling. Amisha’s role is not even worth a mention. DON’T BLINK. Lest you might miss her!!

Ketan Mehta, being an experienced director has not lived up to expectations. The screenplay is very choppy. The transition from one event to another is controlled by the narrative done by Om Puri, who does an OK job. Except for the title song and the Vari Vari, the lyrics are not of the quality we have come to except from Javed Akthar. A R Rahman has given his worst music to date. You wouldn’t keep the album in your shelves for more than a week.

The subject had all the ingredients of becoming an epic. However, the final outcome left much to be desired. You can give the first half a miss. The story gets gripping in the second half.

All said and done, it is not a movie which can be flushed down the sink. The movie has its rare moments, when you feel the patriotism, the intensity, the passion of the moment getting into you. Sadly, that starts to happen towards the end of the movie; when the audience had enough of crap and they are ready to go home.

So, what’s my final say? Well, you got to see it to believe it! Go to the theater with no expectations and you might just have a good time!!